Category Archives: Horror

Ready or Not 2: Here I Come

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Ready or Not 2: Here I Come                       4 stars

I thought I was due for a horror movie, so I went to see Ready or Not 2: Here I Come directed by Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett. (Actually, I have already seen a few this year.) Bettinelli-Olpin and Gillett are known for co-directing both Scream and Scream VI. This is definitely a comedy horror, my favorite kind, and it happens to be a sequel to 2019’s Ready or Not, which I have not seen. But no matter. It was easy enough to pick up the movie’s premise from the opening scenes. A bloodied woman named Grace (Samara Weaving (of Scream VI and Bill and Ted Face the Music)) is seen walking out of a burning mansion and is taken to a hospital for treatment. Once she is well enough to talk, a police detective is there to question her, so we find out that she was getting married in the previous movie, but it turned out that her husband’s family, the Le Domas family, was part of a devil worshipping cult and Grace was being hunted by them in a deadly game of Hide and Seek. If Grace survived until dawn, then she would be free. She succeeded, but the family all died in the fire. While still in the hospital Grace’s younger sister, Faith (Kathryn Newton (Lisa Frankenstein and Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania)), finds her and we find out that the two had a falling out and haven’t seen each other for years. Unfortunately, both Grace and Faith are then kidnapped by the devil worshipping cult and brought to the expansive country estate of the Danforth family, one of the cult’s member families. The Danforth family is now led by twins Ursula (Sarah Michelle Gellar (I Know What You Did Last Summer and Scream II)) and Titus (Shawn Hatosy of The Pitt). Both Gellar and Hatosy (especially) give command performances in their evil roles. These families are part of a conspiracy that controls governments across the world. In the Danforth mansion, in the presence of four of the member families, the plan is explained to them by a sort of sinister attorney (Elijah Wood (Frodo in Lord of the Rings)) with a very large book of rules. Since Grace survived the earlier night, she must now be hunted by members of the various families and whoever can kill her will be rewarded by becoming the Chairman of the High Council making them the most powerful person in the world. But if Grace can survive until dawn, she will be freed along with Faith. But the cult has certain rules that must be followed as they are civilized after all. If the head of any family is killed, then the next most senior family member must take their place in the hunt. No person may kill a member of another cult family. (Your own family is acceptable.) If they do, intentionally or not, then that person must immediately spontaneously explode into mass of blood along with the remaining members of that family. So, there is plenty of incentive to follow the rules. In addition, each family is restricted to using weapons that were in use at the time that their family was inducted into the cult. So, they use weapons that vary from broad swords to rocket launchers. Now, such an absurd setup can’t help but make for a hilarious comedy, as the characters inflict extreme violence on one another. At one point Faith takes such a horrendous beating that you would expect she would never walk again, but in true horror movie fashion she is soon back in action, though a bit bloodied. But wait! There may be another way to settle all this chaos. One character identifies a clause in the bylaws that says if the hunted party marries a family member, they can escape, while the spouse may ascend to the chairmanship. This scenario leads to an even more absurd situation by the climax of the film. By the end, Ready or Not 2 reaches Scream levels of violence while inflicting multiple laughs on the audience. The closest thing to it I have seen before was the comedy horror The Hunt back in 2020. Ready or Not 2 was a real hit at the box office. Horror fans should enjoy this one. Now I may have to go back and see the first Ready or Not.

The Dead Don’t Die

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The Dead Don’t Die         3 stars

The Dead Don’t Die by Jim Jarmusch puts a new comedic twist on an old genre, the zombie movie.  This light but bloody comedy brings together a very talented cast that includes Bill Murray, Adam Driver, Tilda Swinton, Danny Glover, Chloe Sevigny, Steve Buscemi, Rosie Perez, Iggy Pop, Selena Gomez, Carol Kane and Tom Waits.  With this group of actors you wonder how could this film possibly miss.  The movie has more hits than misses so has some moments that don’t hit the mark.  The premise is that polar fracking being done by corporations has caused the earth to move off of its axis leading to strange events throughout the world.  Of course this includes the dead rising from the graves to seek out human flesh to satisfy their appetite which is completely logical, right?  Much of the comedy is delivered by Murray and Driver who both give their lines in the most deadpan manner imaginable.  (Remember, the way to stop a zombie is to Kill the Head.)  Also making a significant contribution is Buscemi as Farmer Miller, the white racist whose accusations have little basis in reality.  There is an ongoing gag involving a new country song that bears the title from the movie.  Tilda Swinton has a most unusual role as the Irish undertaker, a new comer to the small town of Centerville.  It is a very strange role that only Swinton could deliver on.  It being a Jarmusch film, it wanders into the ridiculous at a couple of times that detracted from the overall feel of the movie.  The Dead Don’t Die is not the funniest Zombie movie I’ve seen, but if you are a zombie movie fan you should not miss this one.

Forbidden Fruits

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Forbidden Fruits               1 ½ stars

The new film Forbidden Fruits by first time director Meredith Alloway at first looks like it could be the new witchcraft movie of our present age, like a modernized The Craft or Heathers. Filmed entirely in a shopping mall in Texas, it seems like a satire on consumerism or a commentary on female friendship, but it eventually devolves into bloody horror. The four main characters, led by Apple (Lili Reinhart of Riverdale as Betty Cooper) all work in a mall clothing store, but after hours they gather in their coven to perform rituals and scheme against their enemies they term as the snake. The other members are Cherry (Victoria Pedretti), a sexed up blonde bimbo, Fig (Alexandra Shipp), the smart girl and Pumpkin (Lola Tung), the newcomer from a pretzel stand who may have her own agenda. Apple is very controlling of the others who are usually all too willing to go along to win her approval. They must participate in a strange ritual of confessing their shortcomings to Marilyn Monroe when alone in a dressing room. We soon get the idea that Apple has a past she is hiding involving the death of her father. Then there is a mysterious death in the mall of a former coven member named Pickle (Emma Chamberlain) that Apple may be responsible for. Eventually all the melodrama comes to a climax with accusations and threats and recordings made using a hidden camera in a Barbie doll. And then there happens to be a tornado hitting the mall at a critical moment. The film has a few amusing moments from some of the characters, but in the end the movie was lacking in coherence or a payoff. The music was only lackluster and could have been a way to generate a little more excitement. Forbidden Fruits is definitely a movie not worth your attention. Hopefully, I can find something more interesting next time.

Midsommar

Midsommar       4 ½ stars

Midsommar might be the fright fest of the summer.  This horror movie really establishes Ari Aster as a first rate talent in the horror genre.  Last year he brought us the disturbing “Hereditary” and now he brings us Midsommar, a horror story told in broad daylight.  We start the story with Dani, a young woman who suffers an unimaginable tragedy when her sister and parents are all killed.  She decides to accompany her boyfriend and his graduate school friends on a once in a lifetime trip to a summer festival in a remote Swedish village.  Once there the friends are welcomed to this commune like society and are invited to join in with the villagers in their ancient pagan rituals.  Being involved includes enjoying the effects of hallucinogenic drugs that distort their sense of reality.  The happy mood continues for a good while but things eventually take a dark turn as things are not all what they appear to be. (How could it be any other way?)  Things go from bad to worse for each of the American guests as they discover what their hosts really think of them.  Aster is a master at creating these disturbing scenes that are played out in broad daylight unlike most horror movies.  This movie may also be appropriate for the MeToo movement as it shows how women can react toward the men they are disgruntled with.  Beware, there are several very disturbing images in this one as you would expect from a first rate horror movie.

Scream 7

Scream 7              2 stars

It has been four years since the Ghostface killer appeared once again in Woodsboro to continue his murderous spree on the local teenagers and others, who are related in some way to Sidney Prescott (Neve Cambell), the original victim of the knife wielding Ghostface going back to the nineties. But then, the very next year he showed up again in New York City in search of more victims, (only minus Sidney since she moved away to an undisclosed location (in Scream VI)). This perpetual killer did not let that stop him though. By now you know the formula. Ghostface makes a sudden appearance in Woodsboro, going on his usual rampage killing victims that are in some way connected to our heroine, Sidney. Some local sleuths come up with theories about who the killer or killers may be (Usually there are more than one.) Then there is a final confrontation where the mask comes off and we discover the identity of the real killer who gives a speech on why Sidney deserves to die, only to be killed by one of our heroes in a thrilling climax. Scream 7 has arrived in theaters and it is much the same story as we have seen in the previous six movies going all the way back to 1996. This time around Ghostface has tracked Sidney down in a different town, only now it is Sidney Evans’ daughter, Tatum (Isabel May of 1883) that he is after. The name is Evans now since Sidney is married to the local police chief, Mark Evans (Joel McCale of Community). In Scream fashion we get an opening scene where a young couple goes on a tour of a house built to recreate the original crime scene complete with Stab movie posters and a Ghostface mechanical figure, only to face their end at the hands of the costumed killer. Ghostface goes on to make threats to Sidney over the phone using that familiar, sinister voice, then follows through by stabbing some of the local teens to death who happen to be friends of Tatum. Then the reporters show up to get the story including the famous Gale Weathers (Courteney Cox returning for her seventh appearance) and her two minions. The rest is basically a repeat of the time-tested routine, when the killer’s identity is discovered and we get the same result. The writer of the original Scream movies, Kevin Williamson returns, this time as both writer and director to bring us this seventh of the series. The earlier directors of the franchise were Wes Craven, Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett. But there was an actual variation in the latest movie. In what can be called Ghostface meets AI, things get more complicated for poor Sidney with the creation of AI videos showing previous killers thought long dead reappearing on screen to make more threats. Thus, we see once again Dewey (David Arquette) and Stu (Matthew Lillard) making appearances on screen. The use of AI (without actually using AI in the movie) is an added twist that does nothing to add to the story. In my review of Scream VI, I said that it was time to call it quits on the franchise, but the filmmakers didn’t listen to me. My guess is that there will be a Scream 8 one day. But remember, Shoot ‘em in the head!

Mum, I’m Alien Pregnant

Mum, I’m Alien Pregnant.        3 suns

For my final film of the festival, I saw something really bizarre: Mum, I’m Alien Pregnant in the Midnight section. In this British comedy a young woman gets pregnant via engaging in a sex act with the neighbor boy who is half alien as a result of his mother being abducted by aliens before he was born.  The comedy all centers around the very exaggerated trauma that a woman goes through while pregnant.  There is plenty of screaming and vomiting and slimy fluids involved while the young woman keeps blaming the half alien for her trouble.  There is even a vacuum cleaner involved in a bizarre abortion attempt. We get a peek at what an alien penis looks like and after many antics the baby alien finally arrives.  The movie was a riot in the theater, and the actors even brought baby alien with them and allowed fans to have their picture taken with him.

Rock Springs

Rock Springs.      4 1/2 suns

One movie getting a lot of buzz here is Rock Springs by director/ screenwriter Vera Miao. This movie is in the Midnight section that is reserved for the very weird, sometimes gory films. Rock Springs certainly fits that description as it concerns an Asian mother, her daughter and her mother-in-law who move into an isolated home in the woods only to discover that there is something monstrous hidden in the woods. I can’t say a lot about it without giving away the plot but can say it concerns a small forgotten chapter of the racist history of the US. I really liked the way the story was told in chapters from different characters’ points of view and in a non-linear fashion. It is a monster movie that ends with a hopeful message. And the special effects were very impressive.

Send Help

Send Help            4 stars

If you’ve ever seen a Sam Raimi directed horror movie you know you are in for plenty of comic violence, bloody gore and perhaps a moral message as well. And it’s certainly going to be fun. In Send Help you get all that and more from the Director of The Evil Dead movies and Drag Me to Hell and Executive Producer of Hercules and Xena: Warrior Princess. When I saw the preview, I knew I had to see this one. In the headquarters of a nameless corporation, Linda Liddle (Rachel McAdams in a role unlike any of her earlier ones) has been faithfully working in the Strategy and Planning Department for seven years and has been promised a position as vice president by the president if she sticks with it. She is very smart and well read at survival techniques (being a big fan of the TV show Survivor) but not well liked by her co-workers. Bradley (Dylan O’Brian) arrives as the new president after the sudden death of his father, the previously mentioned company president. Bradley doesn’t appreciate Linda’s disheveled looks and openly mocks her. He then promotes his fraternity brother, who has been there only six months to the coveted vice president position leaving poor Linda in shock. Bradley can’t get rid of Linda because she is too valuable to the company. So, he takes her along on his private jet to an important meeting concerning the impending merger in Bangkok. But before the plane lands it encounters a terrible storm that causes the plane to crash somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. Linda survives the crash and finds herself on a deserted island. Before long though she finds Bradley has washed up on shore, unconscious and with an injured leg. She nurses him back to health and the two of them survive on coconuts, native fruits and fish. All that survival knowledge comes in handy, and she relishes this environment where she is the one in authority, but Bradley resents the circumstances where he has no valuable skills and must be subservient to Linda. Their stay on the island becomes a battle of wills with each eventually feigning a spirit of cooperation but also holding something back from the other. Along the way there is conflict growing between them, plenty of exaggerated gore (in Sam Raimi fashion), injuries (real and implied) and vomiting. McAdams really sinks her teeth into this role, gleefully relishing the circumstances she finds herself in. O’Brien is convincing as the obnoxious rich kid who has had everything handed to him, smirking at those who are less privileged. You really want to hate him. The dark comedy accelerates to a dramatic and violent conclusion that only Sam Raimi can pull off. I was laughing my head off. So go see the movie and have a great time for two hours.

The Lighthouse

The Lighthouse                 4 stars

The Lighthouse is a very dark moody horror film that follows the interactions of two lightkeepers who must work together on an isolated island somewhere in New England in the 1890’s.  This film is by the horror movie master, Robert Eggers who made The Witch a couple of years ago.  This movie may not have quite the supernatural elements that that excellent horror movie did, but certainly scores on its hopeless mood using black and white filming, a smaller screen and some very mournful music and sound effects.  The two actors portraying the lightkeepers give us amazing performances.  Willem Dafoe is the aging experienced man who gives the orders, instructing the younger worker, Robert Pattinson in some of the worst back breaking, miserable work you can imagine.  Both give us haunting and masterful performances.  If there were an Oscar for the best curses uttered by an actor, Dafoe would win easily.  The story centers on the conversations and interactions between the two men as they alternate from hating each other to showing genuine concern for one another.  But ultimately the movie is about a slow descent into madness with a few fantasy elements thrown in.  It is up to the viewer to interpret what these fantasy scenes are about.  And since it is a horror movie there are some very unsettling scenes involving human bodily functions and sexual images.  This film is definitely a downer about humans in a deteriorating situation, but does it in a most impressive manner.  It is not a movie for everyone.

A Quiet Place

A Quiet Place                     2 ½ stars

Last year’s hit monster movie, A Quiet Place, was a type of post-apocalyptic movie in which humanity has been nearly wiped out by ravenous creatures that have ultra-sensitive hearing, but are completely blind.  Thus, the remaining humans can only survive by remaining absolutely quiet in all that they do.  The story focuses on one family living in a house in the woods who have learned to live without talking and raising food without making any sound.  This movie was well received by critics and audiences, but there was too much for me to get over.  There were good performances I am sure, but the holes in the plot were obvious, like how could they possibly raise a field of corn without making any noise.  And there is no real background about how this all came about.  Any good horror movie has to provide some explanation for how the disaster came to be.  I actually enjoyed this year’s Bird Box more than A Quiet Place.  The movie earned an Oscar Nomination for Sound Editing, presumably for the sounds that the monster makes, but I feel like I’ve seen this before in horror movies.  It may have been the best horror movie of 2018, but then I couldn’t find one from last year that I really liked.