I Carry You with Me                        4 ½ stars

Established documentary film director Heidi Ewing (who I remember from her Oscar nominated documentary Jesus Camp) made her feature film debut with I Carry You with Me, a story that should not be missed. We get a unique treatment of two relevant issues in this movie about a young gay Mexican chef, Ivan (Armando Espitia) who meets and falls for Gerardo (Christian Vazquez), but faces a life of very limited opportunities in his home country; thus Ivan enters the U.S. illegally, finds his way to New York City where he finds life equally tough as an immigrant who speaks little English. The film is set in the nineties and shows the scorn gay men must endure in Mexico including from their own families. (Both Ivan and Gerardo are treated poorly as boys by their own fathers.) When Gerardo does finally join Ivan in New York, they must face the reality that their immigration status must prevent them from ever seeing their families again. The filming techniques used by Ewing with hand-held cameras gives us a very gritty feel of what life is like in these low income areas. The film is based on the real-life experiences of a renowned chef in New York, who is a restaurant owner, thus at about two-thirds of the way through, the movie transforms into documentary style as we follow Ivan (now about twenty years older) through his present day life that still includes Gerardo. It emphasizes how for these immigrants reaching the American dream includes a great deal of sacrifice that makes one question if it was all worth it. I Carry You with Me was featured at the 2020 Sundance Film Festival and received a Film Independent Spirit Award nomination for Best First Feature for Ewing earlier this year.